Problems At The Museum

Francine answered Rayette’s call.

“Hey, I wonder if you and Little Ralph would like to go with me and Little Frankie to the Aquarium today?

“I'm not sure, Rayette?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, the last time Little Ralph saw a sea turtle, he got upset. He thought it was his Uncle Leo.”

Rayette knew Leo, with his thick glasses, bald head, and cheap cigars. She empathized with Little Ralph.

“And he was frightened of the flounder.”

“Did he think that was Leo's wife, what's her name…”

“Gloria?”

“Yeah, Gloria.”

“Not exactly… He said it looked more like Little Frankie.”

From Guest Contributor David Sydney

Correcting Errors

My wife was a good woman but controlling. One night, wearing old cut-offs, I found an urn on the beach. I shook it.

A small piece of paper issued. Do not agitate.

“What’s this?”

Another paper. “Voice recognition printer. I can grant wishes. Just speak. It will be printed and granted.”

“This is a bad joke.”

Another sheet. “This is not a yoke.”

Yoke? Voice recognition? I asked for a good life.

Moments later, a woman walked toward me. “Why are you wearing those rags. You have nice shorts.”

Another sheet. “Your good wife.”

“No, no,” I said. Life. L-I-F-E.”

From Guest Contributor Mel Goldberg

Prevail

The Nazis took drastic measures to make me obey their cause. I had been beaten so badly, it took weeks for my swollen eye and broken arm to heal, and that wasn’t the worst of it. They threatened my wife and daughter. If I didn’t do what the Nazis wanted, they would kill my only family.

My parents were shot dead in their home because they hid Jewish friends, and I had been told they begged for their life.

If I continue to refuse, my wife and daughter will be next. I had to prevail; I wouldn’t let that happen.

From Guest Contributor Lisa M. Scuderi-Burkimsher

Lake

The cool lake soothed my warm feet. It was a stifling day and the sun beat on my neck. Trickles of perspiration dripped down my back as I watched people pass by in row boats waving their hands fanning themselves as if that would break the heat. Some were prepared with water in toe and shading.

There wasn’t a light breeze or cloud in the sky, just complete aridity. I didn’t care. The water always gave me respite and I needed it today before going home.

I wanted to enjoy the moment before telling my wife I lost my job.

From Guest Contributor Lisa M. Scuderi-Burkimsher

Frontier

The steep hills and rugged terrain bordered the frontier. Untamed wildlife lay ahead as I stepped into the wilderness on my hunt for food. I promised my wife we’d make a good home. It’s difficult at times, but we managed.

I heard an ominous sound nearby; crunching branches. I turned and pointed my rifle. Before me stood a grizzly bear at least ten feet tall. He growled and started toward me. I pulled the trigger and he fell into a heap. He let out his last breath and stilled.

He was protecting his home; I couldn’t fault him for that.

From Guest Contributor Lisa M. Scuderi-Burkimsher

For the prompt Frontier

Christopher Nolan's The Odyssey

Odysseus is a sad boy. He has been away from his wife and son for a long time. A beautiful goddess forced him to have sex with her for seven years. He really didn't like it. Then he met a beautiful witch and she made him have sex too. Again, he didn't like it.

He sailed past more beautiful women and he wanted to hear their song, because it was supposed to be the most beautiful song in the world, so he tied himself to a mast to avoid having to have sex with more beautiful women.

Poor, sad Odysseus.

Drunk On Power

Jason surveyed all that was his. Turning his head left to right, everything belonged solely to him to do with as he pleased. After years of hard-fought battles, defeat after defeat, he had finally claimed this territory as his own, and there was nothing that Janet could do about it.

He believed he would call it Casa de Jason.

"But if you don't keep this area clean, I'm taking it back from you."

His wife could threaten him all she wanted. This corner of the garage was entirely his domain, and he'd hang whatever heavy metal posters he choose. Bwahahaha!

Evening Walk

I still smelled the floral scent of my wife’s perfume and dreamed of her laughing, a soft cackle that used to bring a smile to my face. Her beautiful complexion used to turn heads wherever we went. She was flawless.

One evening the air was perfect for a walk, or so we thought.

That was the evening a man wearing a mask robbed my wallet. When my wife called him a coward, he shot her in the stomach. When she laid on the ground, my hand cupping her head, she whispered, “I love you.”

My world was never the same.

From Guest Contributor Lisa M. Scuderi-Burkimsher

Adrenaline

Bullets passed by my head in a blur, and I had only one chance to make a run for it.

I hid behind the bushes with soldiers’ lifeless bodies nearby, a sitting duck waiting to be devoured. I took deep breaths, counted to ten, then ran and shot in the air at anything that moved.

I had to make it back to my family. My wife’s sky-blue eyes, flowing brown hair and son’s quick wit pictured in my mind, gave me the adrenaline I needed.

Chaos ensued and men started shooting, but I kept going.

I made it. Then collapsed.

From Guest Contributor Lisa M. Scuderi-Burkimsher

Problems With The Ark

Anyone who builds an Ark can expect complaints, and not just from the animals.

“This’s your stupidest idea yet, Noah.”

She got right to the point.

Not only was his wife seasick after 40 days and allergic to the weasels, but now she had to squeeze between two rhinos to sleep.

“Look, I'm only following orders.”

Orders – that was always his excuse.

Mrs. Noah added more frown lines to her face.

“Well, here's my order. From now on you’re sleeping between the two rhinos.”

“What?”

“No, forget the rhinoceroses.” She knew ‘rhinoceri’ was an improper term. “Make that the hippos.”

From Guest Contributor David Sydney