Interview

“Why do you want to work here?”

I’ve been warned about this, the stupidest, trickiest interview question. Don’t say you, like all job seekers, need a paycheck to pay the rent. They don’t want reality, they want flattery. But don’t get personal. Don’t say it’s because the interviewer is charming. It must be something you like about the company, and it must be believable.

Easy! I give her the real reason I’m attracted to this place. The building is right next to a bus stop, so I won’t have to walk far in bad weather.

I don’t get the job.

From Guest Contributor R.K. West

Housekeeper

The rain pelts my umbrella, so I make haste to avoid getting drenched before my housekeeper interview. The last home I cleaned I left because there had been too much friction between the husband and wife. I didn’t want to be in the middle, so I quit. When I came across a post online of a wealthy couple looking for a house cleaner, I applied. It’s in an upscale neighborhood and I have a good feeling.

I ring the doorbell and a man answers. In the distance I hear a loud crash, and his face turns wan.

I walk away.

From Guest Contributor Lisa M. Scuderi-Burkimsher

Snow

The first thing I did last night was set the alarm for seven o’clock in the morning. I didn’t know the snow the weather forecaster predicted was going to start so early.

There was a message that my interview had been canceled so I got back under the covers and my dog Charlie snuggled next to me.

Large snowflakes pressed against the window and the wind howled. Charlie let out a growl and went back to sleep. I closed my eyes and wished the snow would stop.

When I awakened later that afternoon, the snow ceased, and the sun shined.

From Guest Contributor Lisa M. Scuderi-Burkimsher

Interview

When I stepped out of the car, I took a deep breath and cleared my mind.

I hadn’t been interviewed in years and now older, I didn’t know what my chances were of getting hired. My friend recommended me to the department head, and I hoped that would get my foot in the door.

I had my briefcase in hand with an excellent portfolio and references. What more would they want?

I opened the door and entered the office only to be told by the receptionist that the manager had an emergency and I’d have to come back another day.

From Guest Contributor Lisa M. Scuderi-Burkimsher

Gaslighting After Dark

As the new employee at the haunted mansion, I quickly realized that my job is to communicate with the ghosts rather than clean up after them. Neither appeal to me very much.

To tell you the truth, I don't believe in ghosts. That's one of the first questions Ralph asked during my interview, and I straight up told him I wasn't the kind of person who had fanciful notions about such things. He said that was just fine. It works better when you don't believe.

It turns out that the undead are just as susceptible to gaslighting as the living.

Than Anything Else

I asked him about the authors that influenced him.

He shrugged the question away.

"I'm more embarrassed by the story than anything else. Let it die."

"Than anything else," I thought. And again "Let it die." What was that anything else?

He was at the wood stove again, apparently indicating that was it, the interview was over.

"Walkside, strophanthin, and the adult bookstore," I said, trying to be delicate. "I'm not saying you didn't make things up, but..."

He spun quickly, poker in his hand. The dogs' heads jerked up.

"What do you want from me?"

The interview was over.

From Guest Contributor Rick Henry