Papers

- Good afternoon, sir. Can I see your papers, please?

- Is there a problem, officer? I don’t think I was speeding, was I?

- I said: papers.

- ...uhm...all right. Here they are.

- Are you the person on this ID?

- Yes, I am.

- This picture isn’t very recent.

- Can I take a look? ... No it isn’t.

- I’m afraid I’ll have to bring you in, sir.

- What? Because my picture isn’t very up-to-date?

- No sir, because of the consequences it might have.

- Such as?

- Well...you might run into someone you bullied as a kid and who is now a cop.

From Guest Contributor Hervé Suys

The Beats

Gregory Corso was sitting in the window of Allen Ginsberg's East Village apartment – two, three hours, just sitting in silence. He had vowed to himself not to be a willing participant to any further chaos. Just to be every day, it took everything. You could be having a really nice time at the beach or the park one minute and in the next minute there could be cops with meaty red faces gassing and clubbing you. Once at a reading some lady asked him, “What’s an id?” and he waited a bit before answering, “Eighteenth-century sea captains carousing in Surinam.”

From Guest Contributor Howie Good

Howie is the author of The Titanic Sails at Dawn (Alien Buddha Press, 2019).

They Worked Together, In New York

"Most people are Virgos - know why?" I do. Nine months before September is commonly cold; nowhere to go but bed. The I.T. guy thinks he’s flirting but now I’m just picturing my parents.

We are so many, they economize. One cake only - sheet, naturally - with plastic balloons and red and blue frosting. Children’s cake. We begin to reveal our birth dates around the break room, and I fade away.

Later, the liquor store clerk pity-frowns at my I.D. "Man,” he says, “bet your birthday sucks.” I got nothing to add, except at least I’m around to celebrate it.

From Guest Contributor Vera Duffy

Vera is a semi-retired Mexican wrestler living in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in Puppet Terror magazine and the L.A. Alternative Press.

Election Day

Yesterday was election day. I went to the local high school to vote, but I was denied by one of the polling volunteers. I'd remembered to bring two forms of ID as well as a copy of my voter registration card, just in case the new voting laws made it necessary. When she still said no, I started to get slightly upset.

She claimed it had something to do with the string of severed ears I was wearing around my neck, but I'm pretty sure America stills allows for freedom of religion, so I don't know what her deal was.