Problems With The Ark

Anyone who builds an Ark can expect complaints, and not just from the animals.

“This’s your stupidest idea yet, Noah.”

She got right to the point.

Not only was his wife seasick after 40 days and allergic to the weasels, but now she had to squeeze between two rhinos to sleep.

“Look, I'm only following orders.”

Orders – that was always his excuse.

Mrs. Noah added more frown lines to her face.

“Well, here's my order. From now on you’re sleeping between the two rhinos.”

“What?”

“No, forget the rhinoceroses.” She knew ‘rhinoceri’ was an improper term. “Make that the hippos.”

From Guest Contributor David Sydney

Sweet World

"I agree. I do find the world very sweet. I know there's a lot of ugliness in the world, and not everyone is as fortunate as we are, but there's always a bright side, even at the darkest moments. Like puppies. If there's one thing that we can all agree on it's that puppies are the sweetest thing under the sun. Nothing can be so bad that a litter full of puppies won't bring a smile to your face. Know what I mean?"

After a long awkward pause...

"I was talking about 'Sweet World.' The candy shop. I'm craving sugar."

War

I watched as my buddy exploded into fragments from a grenade. I saw the fear on his face knowing at that moment, he would die. It was chaotic and when I ran for cover, I thought he was behind me, but he stayed to help an injured soldier to safety. Now, both are gone.

I’m in the trench shaken, wishing I were anywhere else but here.

I heard the tanks roaring, and men yelled, guns ready in hand.

My ears rang; head pounded with all sound, until everything became muffled, and my right hand shook uncontrollably.

Then came the explosion.

From Guest Contributor Lisa M. Scuderi-Burkimsher

Old Phone

Scattered pixels form your face, I forgot to delete a few, I still miss you sometimes. I miss you more and hear your voice, recorded, a missed call. If only, who knows when the last time will be the last time prior to, I should have kept my phone in my pocket. You always ask asked me to be more available, I always think thought we’d have another moment. To me you are were forever, forever is never forever. Not even these pixels, replicating your face, fading, scattered, fleeting. Afraid I’ll lose you again, broken charger, my phone is dying.

From Guest Contributor Mekah Baker

Mekah is a student of literature and the applied sciences at Pikes Peak State College.

Supercut

Ray slipped at the top of his building's stoop and flew face first at the cement below. Time elongated as a supercut of his entire life played out like a scene on a museum urn.

There was Ray's first memory: being handed to a smelly, strange man, dressed in red and white with a giant beard. He'd been waiting in line with many other equally scared children. While he screamed, the scary, strange, smelly man laughed and his parents took photos and everyone laughed.

That was really the only memory that came to mind. Ray was only four years old.

Final Goodbyes

As I held Josh’s hand, looked at his face, eyes shut, tubes in his nose and throat, I teared trying to hold back my emotions from a full-blown cry. It had been several months, and the doctors tried everything, but he remained unresponsive. Every day I prayed for a miracle, but deep within, I knew there wasn’t one. So, I continued to speak and visit him often.

Today he’s being taken off the machines, and now it’s time for final goodbyes.

I watched his chest move slowly up and down until his final breath.

A cold shiver.

He was gone.

From Guest Contributor Lisa M. Scuderi-Burkimsher

Debauchery

Rick stumbled into the alleyway hoping no one would notice him puking. The retching sounds could be heard one block over. He got back in his police car and drove away.

Preston kept his hat low over his face while checking into the hotel with his secretary. During the five minutes of sex, he wondered where he recognized the desk clerk from. Hopefully not his congregation.

Barbara dropped one last token in the slot and pulled the lever. She was bust. They never should have voted her treasurer of the cancer foundation.

Just another night in the big American city.

Cirque Du Silly

One summer, I went to Circus Camp. As an acrobat, I was overcome by terror, lost my grip on the trapeze, and plunged into the net before my partner could grab my ankles. Animals hated me. The dancing horse tried to bite me, and the performing poodles peed on my shoes. I looked hilarious in clown makeup, but my timing was terrible, and I was trampled while exiting the tiny car. I tried juggling and hit myself in the face with the balls. Fortunately, the camp staff were brilliant photographers; the shots they posted on Instagram made my family proud.

From Guest Contributor R.K. West

Chloe

I loved the way Chloe licked her lips after an ice-cold drink, and when her long black hair blew in the breeze. When she tilted her face backward, she looked beautiful.

Chloe set up the picnic while I stood under the tree and watched. She was gorgeous in the way she shook the table cloth and neatly placed it on the grass.

The diamond ring was in my pocket, and I was set to propose on this bright warm, sunny day. She’d love it.

Chloe waved me over and I was ready. Then the unthinkable happened.

It thundered, then rained.

From Guest Contributor Lisa M. Scuderi-Burkimsher

Housekeeper

The rain pelts my umbrella, so I make haste to avoid getting drenched before my housekeeper interview. The last home I cleaned I left because there had been too much friction between the husband and wife. I didn’t want to be in the middle, so I quit. When I came across a post online of a wealthy couple looking for a house cleaner, I applied. It’s in an upscale neighborhood and I have a good feeling.

I ring the doorbell and a man answers. In the distance I hear a loud crash, and his face turns wan.

I walk away.

From Guest Contributor Lisa M. Scuderi-Burkimsher