The Bully Business Professor

The asshat in an ascot quoted Foucault. He made faculty senate holy hell. I think he was in English, maybe History; I knew he wasn’t in athletics!

Anyway, motherfucker just loved the drone of his self-important voice. How about the dulcet tone of a head slap?

I snapped and pummeled him. An Engineering professor high-fived me before public safety came.

At my hearing, I learned he was old money, Ivy League—his mom and dad were philanthropists. He smirked when I got suspended.

Afterwards, I gave him a super wedgy and nasty pink belly.

That’s my story.

Paper or Plastic?

From Guest Contributor JD Clapp

The Do-Gooder From Beyond The Grave

Shit! Here he comes.

“I’m running for cancer research on Sunday.”

“Oh, yeah?” I say looking at the gaunt face, an over-achiever in athletics as well as the office.

“Will you sponsor me? Most are pitching in a pound or two per mile.”

Christ, a fucking half-marathon.

I pledge a pound.

“Thanks, it’s a good cause.”

Monday morning. He’s late, he’s never late.

“Bad news,” says the boss. “Mike collapsed and died after the race.”

Thirteen quid saved, I think amidst the office tears.

“I suggest we all double our contributions to show respect,” says the boss.

God damn him!

From Guest Contributor Ian Fletcher

Ian has an MA in English from Oxford University. He has had short stories and poems published in Schlock! Webzine, Short-story.me, Anotherealm, Under the Bed, A Story In 100 Words, Friday Flash Fiction, Dead Snakes, 1947 A Literary Journal, and in various anthologies. He is an Affiliate Member of the Horror Writers Association.