Confidence, Inc.

Jonah saw the ad and hoped it might be the solution to all of his problems.

"In the modern marketing age, where even individuals have begun thinking of themselves as a brand, Confidence, Inc. is there to fulfill your personal advertising needs."

Perhaps Confidence, Inc. would be able to stop the bullying and help make Jonah popular. He decided to visit their offices.

The executives at Confidence, Inc. had never engaged a client as young as Jonah. Most of their customers had at least started middle school. But after a company-wide strategy session, they welcomed Jonah as their first kindergartner.

Mike The Bike Messenger

As a bike messenger, getting hit by a car was a badge of honor. Mike would brag about his accidents to his peers and use them as anecdotes, along with his scars, to pick up women.

But his new job was too dangerous even for his hazardous taste. He didn't care for the gunfire, and he especially didn't like the IED’s. He should have stayed in New York rather than join the war effort in Iraq.

Still, getting ambushed and losing both of his legs in combat made for an impressive story, as did winning the Congressional Medal of Honor.

I Hear Voices

“Roses or Lilies?”

“Lilies, the orange ones, please.”

The wedding was all they talked about. It was a hurried event and they were planning a small affair but it seemed to be driving them crazy. His parents had refused to be a part of it.

Money was tight and they knew it would get tighter still. If it wasn’t the wedding they were talking about, it was the move to the suburbs.

But they’d made the decision to accept him.

Eight months and a few days and he would be able to put faces to the voices he’d been hearing.

From Guest Contributor Shruti Verma

Broken Solace

The town of Broken Solace, located at the end of Route 140, owned a single vehicle, a Buick LeSabre, which was shared amongst the residents according to a very detailed schedule that attempted to account for everyone's needs evenly.

The mayor of Broken Solace did not think much of this arrangement. He believed as mayor he should have his own vehicle and proposed purchasing a Mercedes for his personal use.

The city council approved the purchase. However, the Mercedes became the new community vehicle and the mayor was stuck driving the Buick LeSabre. Not everyone was happy with the new arrangement.

The Balloon Vendors

The people had long dreamed of revolution, but it was the balloon vendors who finally convinced them it was possible. They possessed more than empty talk. They had a plan of action.

They would topple the regime with helium.

It wasn't until much later that they realized their mistake. Helium isn't the explosive element. What you need is hydrogen.

They long harbored a measure of bitterness at their failure, but their prison sentences were ameliorated at least somewhat by the fact they had tried to do something. No one could say the same of the knife sharpeners or pitchfork salespeople.

Sensitive Weather

It was the eve of the Little League finals. Bobby looked out his window and cursed the gathering storm clouds. He desperately wanted to pitch in tomorrow's championship.

The clouds, as all the wise men know, are temperamental. They especially don't take to being ordered about, by God or anyone else. Certainly not by thirteen-year-old boys.

When Bobby woke up the next morning, the clouds were no longer in the sky. They were stuffed into his bedroom. They chased him about for the rest of the week until he finally apologized.

"Next time, don't be so mean," the clouds insisted.

A Loving Husband And Father

He used to be a loving husband and father, a fact so known it was written on his tombstone. His wife knew every night as he was loving her. Once, he loved her so hard she hurt and asked him to love a little less.

He had more to give so he loved Stephanie when her husband’s love had dried up.

He stopped when he disciplined his daughter, who had been such a soft-skinned baby and now was a naughty teenager. That night he spanked her, then loved her along and inside her skin.

Stephanie stopped his loving heart forever.

From Guest Contributor Emily Aledort

Urban Spelunking

When they went urban spelunking in the abandoned tunnels of the city’s old subway system, they were prepared for anything and everything: forgotten homeless, horrible mutants, over-sized rats. But they were not prepared for what they actually found.

The giant mirror blocked the tunnel and made further progress impossible. Then one of them discovered they could walk right through it.

When they resurfaced several weeks later, the world was exactly the same as before, except everything now was the opposite.

Mark liked that he was now rich but life as a black woman was hard even when you had money.

The Artist

No one knew his name, they simply called him the artist. He would breeze into town every few months and offer to paint their portraits.

At first, people were eager to oblige, sometimes lining up for their turn. It was deemed a great honor because the paintings were so lifelike.

But soon they learned about the dark side to having their portrait painted. People stopped trusting the artist and would run away whenever he appeared.

Anytime the artist painted someone, that person became an instant celebrity. The attention it brought was a tremendous burden. They preferred to live in obscurity.

The Abandoned Barn

The children of Glen Haddock often played near the empty barn on Signal Hill. They would dare each other to approach and brag about going inside at night.

The barn was abandoned years before. The children speculated what evil might lay within and noticed that sparrows would fly inside and never fly out again.

There was a man working the field near the barn. He was frightening in his own way. He warned the children away.

"That's where we lock away the scarecrows after they go bad."

None of the kids ever thought of going into the barn after that.