The Sword And The Brush

Jiro gripped his sword lightly, parallel to the ground. He regarded his opponent through unblinking eyes.

Bird song lilted over the courtyard, from a jōbitaki perched overhead. A stray cat licked the festering wound on its right paw. The scent of porridge drifted from the kitchen.

Seventeen students lined the walls, holding their wooden swords in clenched fists. They would not attack, so long as their master was alive. But should Jiro emerge victorious, they would feel obligated to fight for the Dōjō's honor. He would regret their deaths.

His opponent lowered his sword by several millimeters. Jiro attacked instantly.

Genre: Samurai

Wooly Pachyderm Oliver Herm

Oliver walked his forest homelooking about for his favorite comb."I need to part my big bouncy perm,"said wooly pachyderm Oliver Herm.He searched in the trees.He searched on the breeze.He looked under rocksand peeked inside locks.He asked all his friends,with strange odds and ends,whether fury or feathered,uncaged or tethered,"I'm stuck in a lurch,and you must help with my search!"They came with their dads, they came with their mums,all of Oliver's buds, pals, and chums.Whether three toed sloth or echinoderm,to help wooly pachyderm Oliver Herm.

Genre: Children's Literature

Juror Number Five

For the 17th consecutive time, Juror Number Five cast his vote for not guilty, yet again the lone hold out.

"You have got to be kidding me," complained Juror Number Eight.

"The evidence is airtight," repeated the very exasperated Juror Number Three.

But they were growing resigned to the fact they would never sway Juror Number Five.

“I still say there is reasonable doubt,” he affirmed stubbornly.

“The DNA evidence might have been planted by an unknown twin brother he was separated from at birth in an effort to frame him does not constitute reasonable doubt,” sighed Juror Number One.

Genre: Courtroom Drama

The Book Of Jordan

Abiasaph begat Hezekiah, and Hezekiah begat Jordan. Jordan married Immanuel, who bore him seven sons.

God looked down upon Jordan, and desired to test his faithfulness. God sent war and pestilence, killing Jordan's family, and smiting him with leprosy.

Destitute and alone, Jordan entered the holy temple, and begged God for forgiveness. "I know not what I have done, but I submit myself to the Father’s benevolent mercy."

God answered, "You are thinking of the New Testament God. You’ll have to wait a few hundred years to receive salvation. For now, I'm going to continue with the Old Testament retribution."

Genre: Biblical

The Great Compromiser

Millard Fillmore, born in a log cabin, the thirteenth president, cursed his predecessor. If Taylor had not died his second year in office, Fillmore would not be in this mess.

The problem was California. A remote territory infested with Indians and Mexicans. Who would ever want to live there?

But the South wanted a new Slave state and the North was adamantly opposed. There was talk of secession.

Fillmore sought a compromise. Let a future president worry over the problem. If the Union dissolved under his watch, his legacy would be ruined.

Nothing mattered more to Fillmore than his legacy.

Genre: Historical Fiction

Infernus

Key, copper, brassed to pocket. All my pockets, cash folded at the corners. Dirty, keep my fingers pointed down. Pennies in mouth, brassy taste bitter on my tongue a cancer canker sore. Lincoln freed the slaves. Hopeless. Key in slot, key in slot, key in slot.

Down the stairs, construction lot, empty hole, the copper and stone and concrete, vacated bones, constructed homes. The crane a symbol. The modern bird, flightless, tall, littered in locust stone. Watch the step.

Brick dreams stacked red on red. Maybe brownish red. Brick red. Crayola whitewash. I can’t forget my key ever. Don’t forget.

Genre: Joyce

The Epic Saga Of Nathaniel Greenleaf

The wind blew hot. Nat, backing up against the giant oak, fumbled for his sword. The goblins surrounded him, sneering.

Nat had not wanted to become an adventurer. But the evil Lord Vespin killed Dambledorf, his bumbling mentor. The ancient canon demanded vengeance, and so he set off for Castle Shinbone with his motley companions. The only problem, they had no idea where they were going.

“Look inside my trunk,” boomed a voice behind Nat. Was that the tree?

He reached inside a dark cavity, and pulled out a parchment. It was a map. Revenge would be his after all.

Genre: High Fantasy

High School Confidential

The quarterback, blonde, drives a corvette, announced, "We're going to decimate Bayside High at Homecoming." All the girls swooned.

The nerd raised his hand, "Actually, decimate means to destroy one out of every ten."

After class, the quarterback punched out the nerd in front of the head cheerleader. He then asked her to the dance.

The nerd was secretly in love with the cheerleader. He did her chemistry homework, hoping she would remember his name.

At the dance, the cheerleader realized that the nerd was actually the man of her dreams. They lived happily ever after, at least until college.

Genre: High School

The Eudoriad

The oracle decreed disaster. Castor, King of Thebes, would be murdered by his own brother. As the first of seven sons, Castor had six murders to commit if he wished to cheat the fates.

Eudora, Castor's wife, ingeniously suggested he start a war with neighboring Sparta. "Make your brothers into Generals. The Spartans, far superior, will decimate them.”

Castor agreed, but arrogantly wishing to absolve his guilt, he told his venerable mother what was about to happen. He urged her to pray to the Gods for their deliverance into heaven.

Fate being involved, you can probably guess the cathartic outcome.

Genre: Greek Tragedy

The Hard-Boiled Dental Practitioner

When Nora walked into my office, I knew I was headed for trouble, the way a mosquito heads straight for an albino. Her brother was missing, and she wanted me to learn who was responsible. If I could find the 100,000 dollars he stole from her, all the better.

Her brother was the kind of scum that spat in your prescription bottles when he looked in your medicine cabinet. He was wanted by the police, by the mob, by the FBI, by everyone except the U.S. Army.

I told her no thanks. She needed a private dick, not a dentist.

Genre: Noir