Brothers In Arms

'You used my envelope,' Cian stated

'You weren't using it!' his brother Padraic replied.

'It’s my fecking envelope.'

'There's a draw full of envelopes!'

'I wanted that one,'

‘It sat on the kitchen table two weeks and you didn't touch it you fucker ya!'

'But I was going to and I paid for the feckin' thing!' Cian yelled, whilst swigging some Paddy’s.

'I'll give you the money,'

'I don't want the feckin’ money, I want me envelope back.'

'It’s gone now use one of the others!'

'Bollocks to this shite, I'm going on the feckin’ Beer!'

'Well feck off then....'

From Guest Contributor Valkyrie Kerry Kelly

Ned

Ned woke with a sore head. The boys would be bailing hay, might have a spare half-one of whiskey for him. Still wearing yesterday's overalls he yanked on wellie boots and moseyed along the pot-hole filled coast lane up to the farms. Fred and Slap-head saw him weaving in and out of the irritated cows. Sneakily Fred poured a laxative into his moonshine. Great craic!

After a few good slugs of the bottle Ned hobbled quickly through the gate back to his stone cottage. Aggie was furious. He didn't make it to the outhouse. Her mother's floral sofa was ruined.

From Guest Contributor Valkyrie Kerry Kelly