The Accidental Transcendentalist

Having fallen asleep in one town, Thoreau woke up in another, intent on uncovering what had happened to the organ grinder’s monkey. He did everything he could, but with no electricity, there was very little he actually could do. Meanwhile, the police mistook a man in a green suit walking in the forest for Thoreau. The man confessed right off to visiting the pirate queen in her cave. When Emerson dropped in on Thoreau that afternoon, he had the same question as everyone else, “Is this even real?” which was yet another reason why Thoreau loved trees more than people.

From Guest Contributor Howie Good

Howie is the author of I'm Not a Robot from Tolsun Books and A Room at the Heartbreak Hotel from Analog Submission Press.

Afternoon Tea Party

“Eat this, Mom,” she said, handing me a plastic donut.

“Mmm,” I said, pretending it was delicious. I put it down and asked for more tea. Giggling, she poured air into a pink cup.

Someone pounded on the door.

The pot dropped to the table. I slid our pre-packed bag out from under the bed. She clung to me, like a baby monkey to its mother, and reached for her doll.

The door was giving in. Soon, it’d be off the hinges. I hoped we had enough time. I opened the window and my heart clenched.

The FBI waited below.

From Guest Contributor Bethany Cardwell

The Insult

When Michelle walked into the room, Wayne immediately confronted her. Everyone could agree he was the biggest asshole at the party, so nobody was surprised when he said, "You look like a monkey used finger paint on your cadaver."

Michelle nearly broke into tears and no one would have blamed her. Even for Wayne, the comment was horrible. But Michelle composed herself and spoke loudly enough for everyone at the party to hear. She couldn't find the words to explain the series of events that had led up to it, but she confirmed yes, that was exactly what had happened.