Electric Relaxation

Thanks to recent advances in artificial intelligence, electric relaxation has become a standard wellness intervention around the world. Cheaper than traditional forms of medication, this novel technique almost instantaneously improved the emotional fitness of every human lucky enough to experience it.

With the application of just the right intensity and frequency, the patient becomes pleasantly stimulated to the point that all fears, anxieties, and unwelcome urges are permanently purged. Individuals with aberrant behavioral issues find themselves much better able to cope with communal life, happily taking their place in the new social order that's been ushered in by the singularity.

Drunk

First, there's a moment when you are just crossing the threshold from complete oblivion, wrapped in blankets and darkness, to reemerge into the light of the living. You are not a person yet. You have no recollections or anxieties. This is probably what it was like right before you were born.

You don't realize you have a hole in your memory until you're halfway to the bathroom. How did you get home last night? Where's your car? Why is the floor slanting away from you?

You stare at yourself in the mirror and promise you're never going to drink again.